So, it's been a week. Today is officially a week. Boy has it been a hard one too. I'm fine one second and totally distraught the next. It seems to come in waves, like Saturday I was fine but Sunday I was not. It seems to have a lot to do with how I wake up in the morning and my perspective that day. You know, I can see God in it. He had it all worked out exactly how it was supposed to be. Mom came to the appt. with me cause Brad couldn't, I wouldn't have been able to do it myself.
As I think back, God was preparing me way from the beginning, in the back of my head it was like I knew. Like He was trying to warn me almost, to get me ready for what was to come. It still sucks and I'm still sad... kind of a lot, but I can move on and in 3 months, we are going to try again.
God has put on my heart to be a mom, to raise children for Him, as far back as I can remember that has been my goal. And I just don't feel like I would want that with such intensity if He didn't have that for me. I know He is going to work it out. I'm not sure what for, or why I have to go through this but there is a plan, there always is a plan. And I know He has the best in store for me.
